Tag Archive | BDSM

Liking It Rough…

I’m not a brutal woman, but there are times when my diabolical thoughts take me to places I didn’t realize were within me.

Don’t get me wrong, my BDSM, Dominant/submissive experiences have covered a wide spectrum of skills and abilities…last night, I enjoyed administering some physical torture which even found me trying to pull the guy’s cock off!!! (OUCH!!!) Which only fueled us both forward…onward…I thoroughly enjoyed myself and was turned on more than I thought I would be…

I loved seeing how his body danced under the abuse of my arms and hands…I didn’t put everything I had into the swats and blows but my mind was jumping from, oh this worked nicely, now, let’s push the envelope further…

I tried to pinch his nipples off…the more pain to the nipples, the more he enjoyed it…could the neighbors here…I didn’t give it a second thought…nothing like having a cinched up, naked, male submissive with a butt plug inserted, complete with bondage hood, dancing on one’s coffee table to make for an interesting session!!!!

I the frustrations that I’ve cycled through so many times the past 30-days, lightening up their hold on me…administering the torture to the point of loud shouts of pain, groans and grunts, the pain melting into pleasure…it was all good for me…where does it come from? How does the diabolical find it’s way to the surface?

Oh sure, there’s more there, much more laying down in deep in there somewhere…I’ll keep calling upon it, bringing it to the surface and enjoying it, learning how to use it to benefit myself…oh, yes, and to benefit the poor sucker that enjoys that kind of kinky, sex play!!!

One of my most favorite moments? That’s when the cock-meat belongs to me and I make it give up the load of cum boiling in the man’s balls!!! To watch that cock squirt several times, spewing forth that creamy reward, seeing the mess that is made in my hands, by my hands…smeared on the belly and body of my subject, yes, that’s a fabulous reward!!!

And so, with a sore cock and balls, as well as sore nipples and a sore ass-hole/man-pussy…last night’s subject left with a smile upon his lips!!!

NEXT!!!!

Something In The Works…

I’ve been told by a couple of male submissives that I have a diabolic, sadistic imagination.  Over the past few months, I haven’t really indulged my kinky proclivities to the level I’m used to doing…just haven’t had the right mind-set or thought process…

Slowly but surely, those creative, diabolical thoughts are coming back…I consider it a “cycling” of sorts.  I see it in those that come/cum to me on a somewhat regular basis.  The concept makes sense and I apply it to all areas of life…

So, tonight, I wasn’t feeling good enough to get out in the heat for walking group.  I decided what the Hell, a submissive that is new to me has a window of opportunity and wants to submit himself to some cock and ball torture, nipple torture, some anal training…why not?  I need to work through some of my frustrations…why not on a man stripped naked and placed in chains????

In fact, I’ve got two more willing subjects that are plotting and planning their upcoming sessions…one wants to explore the sensual, sensory deprivation session and the other…well, the other wants to be spanked/whipped to tears over and over again, as many times as I can manage in an hour’s time!

Not only does he want to be spanked to tears…he wants to be “hot sauced!”  I’ll go into more detail as I find the time to share…right now, I’m preparing for a rough romp with a new more extreme submissive…should be interesting to say the least.

Last Night’s Session…The Full Version…

I couldn’t let my faithful readers wait any longer for the “full version” of Wednesday night’s BDSM, m2m session…so, here’s the full accounting of that incredible scene!!!

I honestly didn’t know if I would be in the best frame of mind for my Wednesday night session…with everything that has been going on at the office, I just simply haven’t been myself…much less, I haven’t been able to allow my naughty, nasty thoughts to develop into full blown scenes…however, my dear subbie, the submissive male that I truly treasure, revealed his penchant for dabbling in m2m activity.

I do get sexually turned on thinking about two men doing sexual things to each other, sucking each others cocks…one fucking the other…yes, the thought of a man penetrating another man’s asshole as though it were a pussy (manpussy, if you will) just sends me over-the-top excitement wise!!! The excitement factor goes up even more when I’m directing this m2m activity!!!! So, with dear subbie having revealed to his diabolical Mistress that he has sucked cock and is planning on doing so again…I thought, hey, I’m sessioning my least favorite male submissive on Wednesday night…and the least favorite loves to be humiliated and forced to do nasty things…why not take my least favorite further than I’ve ever pushed him?

My least favorite male submissive has a limp cock…he has health issues that prevent a full and proper erection…this is tiring as this guy craves and loves cock and ball torture…all fine if the guy could get hard and stay hard…putting a cock ring on a limp cock that remains limp…well, just looses the appeal and effect. Not to mention all the cock and ball torture devices this guy has bought and given to me, they simply don’t work on a limp piece of man-meat!!! So, what to do with a “limp dick?”

Humiliation…more humiliation than I’ve ever given him before…what better way than to make him suck my favorite male submissive’s hard cock!!!! And so, the plot of my Wednesday night scene began to unfold.

I contacted dear subbie and asked for his assistance in this scene. He agreed. I gave him his instructions and appointed time of arrival. Next, I would make sure my least favorite submissive got a full dose of humiliation, keeping him at a distance…this guy craves constant attention and since he’s my least favorite, I simply have no desire to baby and caudle him…I sent his instructions to arrive on time, his manpussy be clean so that he doesn’t dirty my toys, though I use condoms, I really don’t like ANY fecal matter on the condom when I remove it…of course, this is cause and reason to apply a few more whacks of the riding crop…

My least favorite submissive, sub j., arrived on time at 7:30 p.m. I had him strip naked on the patio, which it is still plenty light out, anyone walking by on the street might be able to see him should they look up my driveway…the first set of instructions were taped to the garage door leading from the patio into the garage…as I said, sub j was directed to strip naked and enter the garage…the next set of instructions were taped to one of the two plastic lawn chairs placed in the middle of the garage. sub j was to neatly fold his clothes and place in one of the chairs, then take the flowered-black panties and put them on, along with the black thigh high hose I had for him to wear…then, after he put on the panties and thigh high hose, he was to bring his tribute to the garage door that leads into my house, put on the full bondage hood and knock on the door. sub j was given explicit instructions to NOT lock the garage door leading out to the patio…that door was to remain unlocked. I wondered how long it would take sub j to wonder why I had given him that instruction…

sub j knocked on the garage door leading into the kitchen…it was time to get this show underway!!! I lead the big goon dressed in the flowered-black panties and thigh high hose, full bondage hood on, into my kitchen. I placed his hands on the kitchen counter where he placed the tribute envelope and waited for me to instruct him further.

I went out and made sure he had followed my instructions about not locking the door…he had…then I returned and led sub j into the living room. I ran my fingers around the elastic of the panties and laughed at his silly he looked…sub j is a big man, 6’5″ tall and large in stature…he’s not fat but just a big guy…his cock was a little harder than it had been previously…I pulled his panties down just enough for me to grab his cock and balls…he sucked in a breath and I laughed as I handled him roughly…I made fun of how he looked in the panties and I could tell this turned him on…I commented on his semi-erect cockmeat…and proceeded to yank on his cock, which made sub j moan and groan with pleasure…then I pushed him forward and told him to hold onto the massage table and bend over…

I proceeded to pull his panties down further, slowly, very deliberately…I slapped each ass cheek with my hand leaving a fine red hand print on each cheek…then put on my sterile gloves and pulled his ass checks apart to examine his “manpussy.” I love how the submissive cringes when I pull his ass cheeks apart…so humiliating…so humbling!!!! I lubed up a gloved finer and proceeded to finger fuck sub j…he started moving and grinding as this felt so good for him.
“You’re nothing but a nasty little whore…look at you, you’re loving how I’m finger fucking you!!!”
“Yes, Mistress.”
“Good, I can hardly wait to fuck you with my toys…I hope you cleaned that nasty manpussy of yours, I sure don’t want to find any nasty stuff on the condom when I pull it out…I’ll have to whip the shit out of you if I do!!” I told him and put a condom on the attachment of my Hitachi wand. Oh, yes, I love to put a little “turbo” action into the scene…I stuck that attachment into sub j’s manpussy and turned on the Hitachi on low…sub j started moving his ass back onto the attachment and I laughed and turned the power up to high…I fucked sub j’s manpussy with that Hitachi wand, laughing and telling him what a site he was…oh, that’s a picture of sub j with the Hitachi Wand sticking out of his manpussy!!!

I took a couple of pics with my iphone and yanked on sub j’s semi-erect cockmeat while I fucked his manpussy…he was moaning and groaning…carrying on something fierce, really getting into his Hitachi fucking…I was so tickled that it was about time for the next part of the scene…

I take pride in my scenes being perfectly timed and dear subbie was right on time at 8:00 p.m. He let himself into the garage since the door was unlocked. I had put his set of instructions out on the empty white lawn chair in the garage when I checked to make sure sub j had followed my instructions about not locking the door. dear subbie found his set of instructions and followed them to the letter…I had left him the red, leather blindfold to put on when he was ready to knock on the inside garage door.

When I saw dear subbie’s headlights pulling into the driveway, I backed off of sub j, hoping he would hear the garage door shut…he did stiffen a bit and then there was the knock on the kitchen garage door…he froze when he heard the knock…
“Mistress, who is…”
“You are not to speak unless spoken to…(whack with the riding crop) did you forget??? Good grief, be quiet. Let me see who is at the door!!” I told him…sub j began to quiver…oh yes, this was going to be such fun!!!

I showed dear subbie into the living room…his cockmeat was already so hard and ready.
“That’s my dear subbie…oh, look, you’re so happy to see your Mistress!!! I just love how hard your cock gets when you come to see me!!!”
“Yes, Mistress,” dear subbie replied. sub j was quivering and shaking…I took him off of all fours on the coffee table and had him sit back in the red leather chair. I made sure I talked loudly so sub j could hear…sub j is hard of hearing so I have to remember to talk loudly unless I’m close to him so he can hear…it definitely takes away from the scene having to talk so loud…I sometimes wonder if folks can hear me on the street, though my house sits back quite far from the street…it is funny to think of how loud I’m talking, what I’m saying…I can only imagine some poor unsuspecting hearing and wondering what in the world is going on in that house!!!

I rubbed my hands all over dear subbie and cooed and praised him where sub j could hear. sub j was sitting rather stiffly in the chair…I could tell he had no idea how to react to this turn of events…there was only one direction this scene could go…I had shared with sub j how much I get turned on by setting two males together…sub j sends me stories he’s written about other women joining us and I have had a gal join us to observe one of sub j’s sessions, but it really didn’t do anything for me…sub j loved it but it wasn’t my favorite scene…now, I was doing one of MY favorite scenes that I had shared with sub j…now was the moment of truth for both submissives…I was curious to see just how badly both subbies wanted to please me…

I had dear subbie sit on the massage table while I talked to them both…and then I decided to have dear subbie sit on the coffee table, on the yoga mat I place on the coffee table to prevent my submissives from slipping off…I placed dear subbie on the edge of the coffee table, spreading his legs where his cockmeat would be completely available…

Next, I had sub j get down on the living room carpet on all fours and crawl up to dear subbie and suck dear subbie’s cock.
“sub j, you are to suck dear subbie’s cock…you better do a good job, no teeth…make love to dear subbie’s cock with your mouth…do you understand?” I asked as I pulled sub j out of his chair and down onto the floor. “If you don’t do a good job, I will whip the shit out of you, understand?”
“Yes, Mistress,” sub j whimpered as he crawled up to dear subbie…my pussy was dripping wet…this was so fucking hot!!!
“Lean back, dear subbie…you tell me if sub j doesn’t do a good job, you hear me?”
“Yes, Mistress,” dear subbie replied…sub j used his hands to find dear subbie’s erect cock…and then slowly he took dear subbie’s uncut cock…dear subbie sucked in a breath of air as sub j took dear subbie’s cock into his mouth…I leaned over and sucked on dear subbie’s erect little nipples…dear subbie moaned and groaned…then I got down and talked loudly to sub j…
“That’s it, you little cock-sucker, suck that cock, make love to it!” I instructed him…sub j’s body was all shaking as he sucked the cock before him…dear subbie was leaning back…I loved the fact that neither man could see the other…that added to the over-all humiliation…but yet, kept their identities safe…
“Feel my pussy, dear subbie…see how hot and wet your Mistress is?” I took dear subbie’s hand and put it between my legs…
“Oh, Mistress, you’re so hot…I don’t think I’ve ever felt you so wet!” dear subbie exclaimed.
“I told you how turned on I get seeing two men playing with each other…now, there’s your proof!” I laughed as I had dear subbie finger my pussy.

“sub j, get back in your chair…put your cockmeat to the edge of the chair…dear subbie, it’s your turn to suck some cock for your diabolical Mistress!!!” I commanded. sub j struggled to get back up in the red leather chair…then placing his limp cock on the edge of the chair where dear subbie could crawl up to him took a little doing, but he managed.

dear subbie got down on the carpet and crawled up to sub j…I pushed sub j back into the chair so his cock jutted out more…dear subbie took sub j’s limp cock in his mouth and began to work it in his mouth…sub j’s hips began to thrust up as though he was trying to fuck dear subbie’s mouth…gawd, it was such a hot scene…so nasty, so fantastic…I then took sub j’s hand and put it between my legs…
“See sub j, Mistress told you how hot this kind of scene makes her…feel how hot and wet I am!!”
“Oh, Mistress, you’re dripping wet,” sub j gasped…dear subbie was doing a good job on sub j’s cock…it was quite a fabulous site…

I couldn’t stand it any longer, my pussy needed attention!!!
“That’s enough, I want you to lick and eat my pussy, dear subbie!! sub j, you sit in the chair and yank on yourself while dear subbie licks Mistress’ pussy!!!” I ordered the two submissives.

dear subbie took right to his task and I had him get down on the carpet in front of me while I laid back on the coffee table, spreading my legs…I made sure I was especially loud in my moans and groans…my throes of passion…gawd, I was hot and needed some good pussy licking…dear subbie always does such a great job at licking my pussy…I was afraid he might drown from my juices as I was so damned wet.

I had another idea as I was getting tired of holding my legs up and apart…so, I commanded sub j to stand up to the edge of the coffee table while dear subbie straddled me on the coffee table…I had sub j hold my ankles up so dear subbie had full use of my pussy…I then had a hold of sub j’s limp cock as it was right there over my face…I rubbed sub j’s limp cock on dear subbie’s asshole as dear subbie and I were in a 69 position of sorts…let’s just say, I was thoroughly enjoying all the sexual attention I was getting and moving the subs around to accommodate my every whim and fancy!!!

I came at least, twice if not three times before noticing it was time for dear subbie to be on his way. As much as I would have loved to have dear subbie fuck me and empty a load of cum into my pussy, time is of the essence in my scenes and it was time for dear subbie to be on his way…I had sub j sit back in the red leather chair while I commanded dear subbie to be on his way…poor dear subbie, I received a note from dear subbie telling me it had been quite a while since he had suffered blue balls…ahhh, if I had had my way, I would have had that boiling load of cum, but the plan was laid and the scene moved on…nothing would have pleased me more than to have sub j clean up dear subbie’s cum mess…but maybe another time!!!

After dear subbie left…I placed the red leather ottoman in front of sub j’s chair and proceeded to grab hold of his limp cock and work it with my hands…sub j kept begging me to pull harder…which I did…I yanked on his cock and balls so hard, sub j was in total and complete ecstasy…I then commanded sub j to finish this Mistress off with his mouth and tongue…I ordered him between my legs, with riding crop in hand, I whacked him if he applied his tongue too hard to my hard little clit…it didn’t take me long to achieve the full body orgasm I had been building with the little cums till this point…off I went into a full, body writhing spasms of joy…the complete and total release was awesome…I really needed that stress relief…I knew right then and there I would sleep like a log…the orgasm released so much stress…I was spent, I was done.

Once I regained my composure. I pulled sub j up out of his chair and led him to the door in the kitchen leading into the garage…I then pushed him out the door…
“I’m done with you, get out of here,” I told him and shut the door behind him. I could hardly contain myself waiting at the door to hear him dress and leave out the other garage door. Once I heard the garage door to the patio close. I let go of my laugh…mission accomplished. How’s that for a humiliating scene!!!!!

sub j sent me a note on Wednesday night stating I had achieved an ultimate humiliation for him. he loved it!!!

Can’t Linger Long…

I’m in preparation for a mid-week BDSM session…I like being able to prepare for a session, then head off to my “day” job to return home in the evening with everything in its place, ready for my scene to unfold.

Tonight, I see my pathetic, humiliation friend…but, I’ve got a nasty surprise for him tonight!! I’ve asked another male to join us…nothing is more exciting to me than putting two males together and commanding…demanding them to perform all manners of naughty, nasty sex acts to amuse me. Nothing turns me on more than to set two males together…my pussy gets all hot and wet just putting my diabolical scheme in this blog post!!!

While the friend tonight would much rather have another woman joining us in the scene…he’s not worthy of having a woman join us. I did have a gal join us for one session…it was way more than he ever anticipated and then for months, he obsessed about this other woman that he wasn’t allowed to see…my female friend had wanted to observe a BDSM session, so having this gal join us, fulfilled something she had been wanting to experience, plus allowed my submissive friend to experience the inclusion of another in one of our scenes…

So, tonight, I get to fulfill one of my favorite fantasies…I’m setting two males to sucking and fucking each other…well, one of the submissive males is capable of fucking…the submissive in which this scene is designed, can’t get a hard-on, so he’ll be doing the sucking and maybe getting fucked all in the same session!!!

Gotta run, time is ticking…

Have a great Hump Day…I intend on having a good day and a GREAT evening!!

Here We Go Monday…

So, I’ve had a day and a weekend to reflect on the situation at the office.  I honestly don’t know what to think or how to feel going into these next 90-days.  I’m fighting back the terror and panic that I feel about loosing my job…is this the beginning of the end?  Should I start looking for another job as several people have suggested?

I’m still going through the emotional cycles of this situation…I have a feeling this cycling isn’t going to ease up any time soon…so, I’m trying to find a way to deal with it…trying to find a way to put it all into it’s place…I did start updating my resume…and I’m at a point where I’m just not sure I want to continue on in the legal profession.

My sister mentioned that this might be a time to make a complete and total change in my career.  I contemplated making a change when the threats of the co-worker-from-hell was happening when my mom died a little over 2-years ago…things settled down at the office, or so I thought, and the situation got better with the co-worker-from-hell and her attorney, who I think is really behind all this trouble I’m having now, and my world settled down…at least, I thought it had.

Now, I’m finding myself fighting nausea, trying to will myself into getting around and getting to the office this morning, every morning…I really don’t want this situation to be the beginning of the end…but I can’t see how else to look at this…is it really the beginning of the end?  I hate to think that the people I work with don’t want me working for them any more…I simply don’t want to work for people that have no confidence in me…

So, I’m perplexed as to how to feel about all this…I’m doing my best to think positive, but the negatives seem to out-weigh the positives by leaps and bounds.

Time to get moving along…I’ve got a busy nasty week ahead…time to get back in the saddle and ride back into Nastyville!!

I will be sessioning my extreme BDSM friend on Wednesday evening.  My dear subbie has revealed a penchant for dabbling in m2m activities, which fits so well with what I want to subject my goofy-assed extreme friend to experiencing…time to humble him more and I’ve got just the right scene forming in my head!!!  I’m so excited, I can hardly contain myself…my pussy gets hot and wet just thinking of all the possibilities…

Time to hit the shower…get this Monday underway…take care and take some time to reflect today…Have a good Monday.

Okay, Let’s Tackle Saturday…

Tackling Saturday…that’s always an interesting situation. Instead of burning my right wrist like I did last Saturday morning cooking some breakfast and getting over my upper respiratory issues, I ate a bagel and headed to late morning yoga class. It is so freaking amazing how all that stretching and sweating can get the blood flowing, the thoughts moving into a more constructive and positive mode…no, I don’t have any more clarity to the issues I’m facing at the office, but I’m not seeing those issues as so impossible.

It is much cooler today than it has been earlier in the week…the weather front that was moving in this direction blew through late yesterday afternoon and now there is light rain interjecting itself…eliminating any yard work today…tomorrow, I’m devoting some time and attention to cleaning out my dad’s house…

Today, I’m tackling some projects around the house…haven’t heard from any naughty, nasty friends…sometimes being open to spontaneity is the frame of mind to keep…

Why is it so difficult to let go of the stress and strife of every day life? Gotta see if I can figure out how to fix some zipper pulls…on clothing you dirty pervs…though doing a couple of cock and ball clothespin zippers would be fun and interesting…dispense a little cock and ball torture to those seeking such…

Yep, I’m tackling Saturday!!!

March Is Going Out Like A Lion!!!

The wind is still blowing though the sun isn’t up just yet…it’s supposed to be another blustery day with the temps peaking out around 80, today.  Tomorrow evening into Saturday is supposed to bring a weather system in that will bring showers and possible severe thunderstorms…it is springtime in Oklahoma.

I am ever amused at how folks buck up when there is a religious holiday and want to call the holiday something “neutral.”  Why can’t folks just let the religious folks alone…these holidays only happen once a year…it isn’t like EVERYONE is wanting to change the name of things…always a controversy….someone has always got to be keeping things stirred up.

I’ve had a couple of requests to session this weekend, but I’ve got too much family stuff going on.  I might even make it to Saturday morning yoga class if I can get up and around Saturday morning.  Sunday morning, I’ll be heading to my sister’s house to enjoy Easter with the family…it will be a different kind of day…as I mentioned in a previous post, the first holiday without both of our parents…sort of surreal.  I wouldn’t have a problem enjoying a fuck client or two, but I’m simply not ready to tackle a BDSM session…that requires me to be on top of things mentally and I’m just not there yet…I do have a BDSM session scheduled for later in April, I’ll be ready then…in fact, I’m looking forward to enjoying that particular client.

I need to get moving along…get my work day under way…I’m looking forward to getting my hair cut this evening by my crazy hair-stylist.  The gal cuts my hair really well, though she’s got lots of personal issues, she cuts a good short haircut…as long as she cuts my hair the way I want it, I’ll stay with her…now, if she starts jumping salons too frequently, I will go back to one of my earlier stylist who has moved to a salon in south Tulsa…I went to that gal for 7-years before she left the fancy salon I finally gave up on…she quit cutting hair for about a year or two…I got an announcement in the mail that she was joining another salon next week.

March came in like a lion…now, it’s going out like a lion…there was no lamb involved in the comings and goings of March!!!  Have a great Wednesday!

Hump Day!!!!

I plan on doing some “humping” tonight!!! Of course, that depends on the direction of my session tonight. I’ve been busy cleaning and preparing for my submissive of this evening. I’m looking forward to the sensual torture and yes, what pain I do administer…not much, just enough to push the submissive’s boundaries a bit.

I know I will get what I seek out of the session…I’ve learned over the years that I get my jollies in various ways…sometimes it’s in the form of having a submissive perform oral sex on me just the way I like it until I cum on his tongue and mouth. I like taking the submissive’s ability to touch me away…having him spread-eagle bound and the leather hand mitts in place, ensures that the submissive must use his mouth and tongue and rely on my ability to instruct him on how to flick his tongue, how to lick my delicate clit…my juices flow nicely when I’m properly stimulated!!

Now, as to whether or not my submissive is allowed to realize his orgasm…that just depends. There are hopeless cases where I know I can’t bring that man to realize a relief that an orgasm will bring. I do love to watch a hard cock erupt spewing forth a large load of cum…nothing pleases me more…seriously, I would rather bring a man to orgasm by my hands where I can watch the result of my hard work than to straddle him and ride his cock like a live sex ride!!!

Don’t get me wrong, penetration is good and often a sought result to further along my second or third orgasm…but not necessarily something I indulge or engage in when sessioning…I do love it when a man begs to be allowed to cum…such a powerful experience!!!

Okay, enough lingering on the sex talk…I’m making myself horny!!! I’ve got to get through the work day first…get the day well in hand and get it done…I was extremely busy all day yesterday, so the day relatively flew by…I’m hoping today will be much of the same. Move the day along, move the week along…

Have a great Hump Day!!!

Back In The Saddle Or Is That Back With the Paddle???

‘m getting everything set up for a mid-week, evening session…tomorrow night’s victim would like to have his ass reddened and heated…his balls stretched with a few weights, as well as some electro-play…and then be “forced” to service and please this Mistress…hmmmmmm, wonder what other diabolical tortures I can come/cum up with for our session???

I will lay my elements of torture out tonight and in the morning…that way, when I return home from work, I’ll have time to unwind and get in that Diabolical Mistress Zone!!

Letter To My Submissive…

My dear subbie,

Mistress enjoyed your e-mail of Wednesday (Hump Day).  It’s always so fun to find a note from you and read what is going on in dear subbie’s life. Yes, your e-mails still bring a smile to this Mistress’ lips when she reads the directions of dear subbie’s thoughts.

Mistress has had one of those unfortunate life-happening weeks.  Two deaths in one week can really bring things down, but a necessary part of life.  Both deaths were of dear women that have been in my life, one much more than the other…

The first death was of a dear woman that was the mother of my youngest brother’s best friend.  She died quietly in her sleep on Sunday into Monday.  A blessing if there is one to be found in death.  While one is never really ready to turn loose of a dear one, I find it somewhat comforting to think that if the passing was gentle and quiet, it was simply that person’s time to go…their number came up and they were ready to take the hand of the angel sent to fetch them.

I find it interesting how different people’s thought processes are on the issue of death.  While I was raised in several different Christian churchs/congregations…I’ve found comfort in creating my own ideas of what happens when one dies.  More so with the death of my own mother…and have decided that the whole concept is a work-in-progress.

I have learned that every single person deals with death and grief so VERY differently.

The other passing was a woman that practically raised me and my siblings.  My sister was the daughter the woman and her husband would never have.  The woman was barren which is always tragic, but there were never any options discussed, at least, not that I remember or recall.  My sister filled the bill when it came to having a new baby around and living next door to my family or rather my family having moved in next door to this childless couple was a blessing for both households.

This woman and her husband were like another set of grandparents.  They were always there for us and took care of us when my own parents were caught in the throes of early family-hood…my mother had serious psychiatric problems when we were little…between this wonderful couple next door and my biological grandparents on my dad’s side and maternal grandmother from my mom…me and my three other siblings were raised.

This woman taught me how to cook, sew and clean house…something my mother was never able to do for one reason or another…I can’t help but remember all the fond memories of prom dresses and “outfits” for everyday that this woman made for me and my sister.

The sad part of this woman’s passing is that she died a slow and painful, struggling death…dementia had set in quite rudely over the last couple of months.  The woman’s dear husband of 65 years was at her side and was so distraught when he admitted he could no longer care for his wife on his own.  My sister assisted in finding a suitable assisted living center that specialized in care for those with Alzheimer and dementia…how incredibly expensive that was…and it became a reality that this was not enough care for the dear woman.  After many trips to the hospital over a few weeks…the recommendation from the doctors was full nursing care and to make her comfortable.

I can think of no crueler death than that from the loss of one’s mind…the body soon follows suit and starts to shut down…it is so difficult to watch and more so when you’re directly involved with that person…and then it finally ends.  It is a blessing of sorts if you can find a blessing in death…out of pain, out of suffering, out of the blasted body that held the person captive during that horrible time.

Mistress was able to enjoy one lowly submissive this week…a new client to the fold.  Unfortunately, this submissive doesn’t hold a candle to Mistress’ dear subbie…I do my best not to compare those that serve me, but the reality is that dear subbie provides Mistress with the “whole package!”

Mistress works with what she has before her but that doesn’t mean she necessarily likes the package before her…in other words, the vessel of this submissive was sorely lacking…extremely over-weight with a hang-over in front that made finding his cock-meat a real challenge!!!  Of course, the cock always seems three times smaller when hidden under folds of skin and fat…but Mistress is determined to bring forth the desired results, though the thought process of having that cock-meat near Mistress’ smoothly shaved pussy never really becomes an issue…

So my dear subbie…Mistress will be attending a funeral on Saturday morning…and then a viewing on Sunday afternoon and another funeral at noon on Monday.  I’m going to take off of work on Monday and devote my time and attention to the dear man that is left behind by his wife of 65-years.  The dear woman was a few years older than her husband, she was 90 to be 91 in April when she passed yesterday…then it will be back to the grind of things on Tuesday.

Good news for my oldest son the Trooper.  His transfer  went through yesterday and he will assume his new duty on Monday evening.  He will be working the night shift and will no longer need to leave his patrol car at my house.  I’m happy for him but sad that I won’t be seeing him on any type of consistent basis.  I’m trying to rejoice in gaining my ability to session when I desire back…but at the same time, sad to see that chapter come to a close.

I hope dear subbie has a good weekend…Mistress is so hoping that this winter crud comes to an end as we head into March…take care and write when you can…Mistress does love hearing from you.

Sensually, sincerely,
Mistress Elizabeth