Just Not Feeling The Connection…


I have had a guy over the last couple of weeks that took to me and fully expected me to take to him in the same way…in other words, this guy is enthralled with me and felt I should be the same with him.  Our exchange has been through a sex site, the personals…he refers to himself as being “in the lifestyle,” which I had him clarify which lifestyle as there are several as far as I’m concerned…he declared himself to be experienced and still in the “swinging” lifestyle here in the Tulsa area.

Well, that told me a lot because I have been less than impressed in the swinging lifestyle folks here in Tulsa…definitely not the caliber of folks that I would find myself socializing in what is referred to as a “vanilla” social setting…so, I knew in my mind that this guy doesn’t really have a good base for what I feel are the best folks that I would like to associate with as far as swinging and sex goes here in Tulsa.

Anyway, this guy fully understood that I am a gal that enjoys a specific kind of arrangement with the men I engage in sexual activities…in other words, I’m not into sex for free or sex for the sake of sex…oh sure, I could if I wanted to indulge those that contact me on the sex site, but I prefer the arrangement I enjoy which a monetary donation is given to me in exchange for an hour of adult fun.

This guy doesn’t have a problem with that kind of arrangement, as long as it doesn’t apply to him.  Seriously, if I’m engaging in an e-mail exchange with you, I’m showing some level of interest, but if you’re not on-board with what I’m seeking in a man and with a man, well, chances are I will dismiss you as a “real” candidate to be invited over to engage in sexual fun.

This guy emphasized his desire to simply “be a friend.”  He provided me with several examples of the kind of friend he desires to be…as well as including if hot sex happened, it would be a benefit to both of us…okay, I can understand a guy hoping that this would evolve into a friend with sexual benefits…again, seriously, the list of men wanting to simply be one of my “friends with sexual benefits” is quite long.  I only consider and have actually enjoyed two men on that long list…and those two men can tell you, I rarely call on them unless it is a swinging group situation or a special session where I’m needing a “free” male cock to assist in one of my BDSM session/scenario…

So, this guy shares with me several scenarios in which he could be the friend that I really need in my life…that would also be there with a hard cock should I ever feel the need to get a good, hot fucking.

I asked the guy for a pic of himself…well, that definitely provided me with the ability to stand my ground that I had no desire to meet this guy unless it was on my terms.  His looks, well, he’s extremely overweight, which equates in my mind as to the belly over-hang factor as to how big his cock is when fully erect…nothing is more difficult that a woman trying to fuck a big-bellied man…getting to his cock, unless he’s got a horse cock and most guys that have the physic that this guy does usually have small cocks, that when fully erect are barely 5-inches long and you have to push his belly back to find the hard cock…you can’t possibly allow a man of this size to fuck you in the missionary position because he would crush you…so, the best way to approach a man like this to fuck is to get on top of him…and then you have to have the ability to get your legs to spread really far open…and then the guy’s belly over-hang is still going to be in the way…it can be done, but it is a lot of work and the chances of a satisfying fuck for me, are slim to none…I can fake it with the best of them and that is what would have to happen with a guy of this size in body!!!

The guy sports a full, short beard…that’s a big turn-off for me…my ex-hubby sported a full, short-beard…I didn’t find it particularlly enjoyable, especially when engaging in oral sex…a full, short-beard can be downright painful after I’ve just shaved my pussy…so, the guy’s pic did nothing but solidify the terms of a get together with me.

Of course the guy presented all the reasons why he couldn’t “pay for pussy”…one being that he couldn’t sexually function on an “egg timer” time limit situation but that he rather preferred to allow a sexual encounter unfold as it would…okay, give me a break, if you’re that hung up on taking your time when engaging in sex with a woman, then you definitely are not the man for me…friend or otherwise…my philosophy is that if you can’t make good use of the time you have for sex, then what is the point…hours and hours simply doesn’t equate for me…I simply will not indulge a man that wants to “go all night” or a man that declares he’s going to give me “hours and hours” of incredible oral sex…seriously, be realistic in your time-frames…I do suffer from adult sexual attention deficit disorder…in other words, you mention hours and hours and I instantly loose interest…

So, the guy follows my blog on the sex site and he presented all manners of thought processes where he would and could be available as an “extra cock” in one of my BDSM scenes where I “force” a man to suck another man’s cock…I set the clarification for this guy that anyone, man or woman, participating in one of my multi-person scenes would be included in that scene because he/she could provide the monetary requirement to be included in that scene…the FMF scene I’m planning for a couple of my submissive guys in February, will be paying for the privilege of having me and another woman, a close friend of mine, to be sexually dominating each man in a separate fantasy-cum-true scenario…nothing is “free” when it comes to an encounter-fantasy come/cum true…

Finally, my guy seemed to understand and “get it” that I wasn’t interested in simply being his friend that would eventually turn into a friend with sexual benefits…I simply am not interested in someone of that physical stature and appearance being someone as a constant in my life…I would much rather go it alone than to have a man like that hanging around all the damned time…

So, I just wasn’t feeling the connection with this guy.

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